“Take a deep breath”, she said.
Take a deep breath.
“And close your eyes”
And close your eyes. Get comfortable, relax, but please don’t
fall asleep. Breath in through your nose and out through your
mouth. Deep breaths. In and out. In and out.
I’m lying on the hardwood floor of the yoga studio, but this
isn’t a yoga class. And I’m finding it hard to relax, hard to
get comfortable, cause it has been a terrible day AND cause
I’m not that kind of person. I can’t even stand yoga. I have
a short attention span, my mind starts to wander, the yoga
instructor has to constantly come by and touch me
ALEX comes over as a yoga
instructor and touches Sarah.
Adjust me, cause my mind is wandering and..
Let your thoughts go to where they need to.
I just want to smack the shit out of these people.
ALEX goes away.
Now. Pick a place in nature. On the earth. A place you can
grounded. A place that makes you feel safe. It could be a
real place or it could be made up. This is your own sacred
And this class, this class is suppose to maybe help that. My
impulse to smack the shit out of people. So (deep breath).
I start. Why not. I think of nature. I start to think of a
beach. Warm sand. Waves crashing. The sun is setting.
No fucking way! No fucking way!
But then I think of my ex-boyfriend who I lost my virginity
No fucking way!!!
And his reaction when I told him I was a virgin. The beach is
no longer very serene. I pick another place. I pick a meadow
in Colorado, but that is connected to Chris, another fucking
boyfriend. And I think of our cross-country road trip. The
long stretches on the road, looking out the window at this
vast beautiful country. Nevada, Utah, Wyoming, Nebraska. Then
in New York City where..
Sarah. Shit. I’m sorry. I know this is fucked up. But…well.
I think I’m going to stay. Here in New York.
If your mind wanders, just come back to that safe place. Ease
Back on the road driving as fast as possible. Listening to
his mix tapes. Crying.
It starts with some Velvet Underground and then there is some
Curtis Mayfield, and the last 20 minutes or so…
Now as you are grounded in that place.
I stop the car, Yoko Ono shrieking away, and start running
into a meadow. And it’s there I decide.
Feel the earth around you.
I’m taking all my savings and getting the fuck out of here.
And what if now
Yes! I drive home. I book tickets. I leave!
Paris. Barcelona. Athens. Rome. Vienna
See the world.
What if now you
And my last Euro spent on a gondola in Venice…
Sei bella come la terra.
Feel yourself rising up.
It is here that I realize that it’s not just me. That cities
themselves are built on shaking ground. On water. Landfill.
That a building, a structure, can look beautiful and solid,
but maybe they are built as impulsively as a love affair.
That they could crumble at any moment, down, back down.
Feel your body seeing our safe place and then what surrounds
And I rise above Venice and Rome and back to the states. And
as I’m up there. All the bad boyfriends. All of the fucked up
housemates, all the bullshit jobs, they all slip away, and I
look down at the earth. The Earth. And I see it as it was.
Untouched. Clean. I see where the ocean turns into rivers
turns into streams. Meadows undisturbed. Just moss. And
Now come back down. Back to you spot. Wherever you went on
your journey, just let it go. You are back in your safe
place. And you can breath. And see where you are now.
And I laugh out loud! Because here I am doing a fucking
And we can settle for a few more minutes. And you may sit up
whenever you are ready.
I’m actually kinda feeling grounded. After bouncing around.
Shit jobs. Asshole after asshole. Maybe this is where I can
be the “me I want to be”.
Thank you for coming to this free sample class. If you are
interested in continuing, please feel to talk to the front
desk. They can sign you up today, or you can feel free to go
online and sign up there. Oh, it’s SFEarthandspirit.com.
Thanks again for dropping in.
And now I can start. Rebuild.
Alex walks by and brushes her by
For a second Sarah looks like she
is about to smack the shit out of
him. Then she breathes. She smiles.
She walks away.
ShotzSF: Earth April '13, Zac Jaffee
As Above, So Below by Zac Jaffee