Lights bang up. Rehearsal Room – Day. Lemon and Charisse are in mid conversation.
LEMON:
What the hell are you talking about? He’s absolutely right for it.
CHARRISE:
Denzel cannot play Kanye!
LEMON:
Who then?
CHARRISE:
I was thinking more like… who was that guy who was in that movie with Di Niro? Cuba Gooding Jr.!
LEMON:
Maybe we should get back to writing. We have a lot of work to do. We have both sides of the story covered. All the lyrics are done, the script is fantastic, now all we have to do is write the book. Did you bring any ideas?
CHARISSE:
I have the sheet music I’ve been working on right here.
LEMON:
Me too.
CHARRISE:
Okay. Let’s start with the driveway scene when Kanye’s getting into his limo to go to the meeting. What about something like…
Music Instrumental “Don’t Rain On My Parade” blasts on. She sings and dances along.
CHARRISE (SINGING):
I’m steppin’ out and goin’ to see the Prez. You fuckers don’t like it gonna bust some heads. Can’t stop me cuz I’m gonna do it anyway. I’ll tell them all with a little drama, “Don’t fall into the trap with the unibomber”. I’m bustin’ down that wall, gonna see him today.
Music stops.
LEMON:
I don’t know. It’s a little derivitive, isn’t it? Do we want it to be that kind of Big Band tune for Kanye?
CHARRISE:
Well, he is a man of the people. He has a monolithic voice.
LEMON:
True. How about we go in a different direction. Let’s work on the scene when he’s in his bedroom making the decision to follow Trump. How about something like…
“I Dreamed A Dream” from Les Miserables comes up. Charisse sings.
LEMON: (SINGING)
Havin’ a crisis of the mind. My path to riteousness has fallen. I see a man who’s standing tall and bears a cap to ease the burden. While all my friends will tear me down. I’ll wear his cap and wear it proudly. Cause he’s my Presidential bro and he will make me lots of money.
The music stops.
CHARRISE:
Yeah, I don’t know. I feel like it drags a little, don’t you think? It’s got to be upbeat for Kanye.
LEMON:
But he’s at a point of crisis in his life. His friends are tearing him down for wearing a hat for God’s sake. There has to be some pathos.
CHARRISE:
We can come to a decision about that one later. Let’s move on to the Trump scene when he’s about to leave the oval office for the meeting. I had this idea: Since he’s kind of gruff, we make him speak through the song in a kind of a sing-songy way…
LEMON:
What?
CHARRISE:
You know, like…
“Why Can’t The English” comes up. Charisse does a Rex Harrison/Donald Trump impersonation.
CHARRISE: (singing)
Why can’t the media be a little more discreet? They twist up every meaning of everything I tweet. If I say “global warming isn’t really true”. They say he doesn’t have a clue. I twittered here I tweeted there about young Kanye West coming to the boardroom of my humble White House nest. He’ll say some rappers flattery and because he’s quite loquacious. At least now they’ll think I am not a racist. Why can’t the white supremasists just quiet down?…
LEMON:
Stop, stop! That sounds really familiar. I really think it needs some extra “Umpf”. For the Trump/Kanye inner monologue scene at the meeting, how about this…
LEMON: (singing)
I’ve got skills, so Presidential, and a monumental IQ. And my presidency has such potential to be quintessential! Everybody wake up, cause you need a man who can give you what you need. Everybody bow down, cause you know I can make all the liberals start to bleed. Make the democrats concede. I’m the one that you want I’m the commandant. yeah! Ooo, ooo, ooo, honey…
CHARRISE:
No! It’s too schmaltzy. Don’t you think we should take a cue from Hamilton and do some actual contemporary music? We’ve been working so well with each other. I think we should try to write the music together.
LEMON:
Alright. Where do we start?
CHARRISE:
Let’s start with the finalé when The Donald and Kanye are posing for the cameras.
LEMON:
Okay, let’s start out in “G”…
They start composing a song together.
LEMON:(SINGING)
I’m a motherfucking rapper here with the President and I’ve been spittin’ out my word pearls at this event. Like I told the Donald when we had our little chat, I turned into Superman by puttin’ on his hat.
CHARRISE: (singing)
He may be the king but I’m the God that rules this land. From the lowly to the mighty they all revere my brand. From the Saudies to the Russians let there be no confusion, we need to sell those arms and there is no collusion. There is no collusion.
LEMON: (singing)
In case there’s some confusion.
CHARRISE: (singing)
There is no collusion.
They repeat and fade.
CHARISSE:
Now, that’s what I’m talkin’ about!
They hug. Lights out.
Art and Music in Our Souls 